The klaxons wailed and the lights flashed and we heard the announcement. "Off world activation." We had been in the briefing room, the General, the Colonel, Jonas, Teal'c and I. We hurried down the steps to the Control Room. Daniel was off with SG-11 again.

"What we got?" Asked the General.

"Tok'ra IDC, sir." I answered.

The General took the microphone. "SG-3 and 4 to the Gate Room."

SG-3 and 4 entered the Gate Room and took up positions, weapons aimed at the wormhole.

He turned to the young man at the other console. "Open the iris."

"Yes, sir."

It was an exchange that I had heard a hundred times or more over the past seven years. Even when opening the iris was a good thing, sometimes, bad things followed. I never know what to expect any more. Some times I just want to walk away from it all. Most times I can't wait to see what happens next.

We stood and waited. The Colonel stood at my side as he did most of the time. Teal'c and Jonas stood behind and to the left of us. The General was nearest to the window. There was a moment in time when it seemed that time stopped. Then there was a fluctuation in the event horizon. A figure in Tok'ra garb came through. I stood rooted where I was. The Colonel on the other hand was more vocal.

"Well, I'll be damned."

The General moved forward to the microphone. "Identify yourself."

"General Hammond. It is I, Martouf."

Jonas Quinn was the first to speak. "Isn't he dead?"

I cringed. The Colonel moved a bit closer to me allowing his arm to touch mine.

The General turned to Colonel O'Neill. The Colonel sidestepped about half a step, as did I recreating a "proper" distance between us. Then he shrugged. We'd seen stranger things. General Hammond turned back towards the Gate. "Major Martin escort our guest to the Infirmary."

Major Martin acknowledged the orders. Then he and his men moved "Martouf" out of the Gate Room.

The Colonel moved closer to me. He stood as close as one could to another and not touch. "Carter."

"Yes, sir?"

"You OK?"

I didn't know if I was or not. I mean, a man that I had killed just walked back into our world. I didn't know what to think. My mind was going a mile a minute running possible scenarios. I considered everything from an alternate universe Martouf to a genetically altered double. Not once did I consider that this Martouf was my Martouf. Not that he was ever mine. Jolinar's perhaps, but not mine.

"Carter?" This time the Colonel's voice was soft and there was a gentle hand on my shoulder.

"Sir?" My eyes met his. Even now, even knowing what we know can't be, those eyes melt through years of walls I've built to protect me. He knew I'd been miles away doing what I do best. Still, there was the concern I always saw in his eyes when he was worried about me.

"I said, "Are you OK?""

"Yes, sir. No, sir."

General Hammond had moved closer. The General and my dad were and are friends. He's like an uncle to me. If it weren't for him, I'd probably be at NASA now and dad, well, dad would be dead.

"I understand your confusion, Major." He had a way of saying that things were OK without saying it. The General was a good man and a good General. Fate had put the right man in charge of the SGC. "I'm not sure what's going on Major, but we'll find out."

"Permission to go to the Infirmary and interrogate our guest, sir." Jack was chomping at the bit to find out what was up with our latest "guest."

That's the Colonel. He hates not knowing what's happening almost as much as I do.

"Permission granted." We all started to leave. "Major. Could you remain for a moment?"

"Yes, sir." The Colonel flashed me a look as he headed down the steps. It was O'Neill language for "I'll keep you posted." I nodded.

The General and I walked back up the steps to the Briefing Room. He put his arm out to indicate that I should sit. I sat where the Colonel usually sat. The General took his chair.

"Major, I know this is going to dredge up some painful memories but I need to know. Is there any chance this is Martouf?"

I flashed back on what happened that day. The Colonel was willing to sacrifice his sanity and perhaps his life to save mine. The Colonel admitted feelings for me that went beyond being my CO. I admitted the same thing. We found out we weren't Zartacs and that Anise/Freya's machine was not infallible. Then we realized who hadn't been tested. Then I killed my friend. I killed the man/symbiote that Jolinar had loved for a hundred years. I could hear her memories screaming at me not to do it. I can only imagine how much pain the Colonel felt when he killed the Entity believing that he had killed me.

"Major?" The General reached out and touched my hand. "Sam?"

I refocus and see the concern in his eyes. "It's OK sir. I was just going over what happened that day. Knowing what I know now, while I can't see how it could be Martouf, I can't dismiss that it might be him. I'd need to hear his story and talk with him. I might be able to sense if he isn't Martouf."

I came to the Tau'ri in search of Samantha Carter. Of all the people in the universe, I knew that she would help me. I knew that I would be sequestered until my identity could be confirmed. I suspected that Colonel O'Neill would be the one to question me.

I sat on the bed in the Infirmary as Dr. Janet Frasier examined me. My DNA was on record here from my previous visits. I was a bit concerned as how they would be able to identify myself without Lantesh within me. I hoped that Samantha could do that. We had shared feelings and emotions once. She had allowed me access to that of Jolinar that still resided within her.

"Well, Marty. It seems that you have returned from the dead."

"Colonel O'Neill." He hadn't changed much, perhaps a bit grayer than the last time I had seen him. While I was then a Zartac, I still knew of his intended sacrifice of himself to save Samantha. I, as others, knew of his intense feelings for her and his concern over my friendship with her. "I need to speak to Samantha."

"Major Carter is unavailable. Guess you'll just have to talk to me."

Doctor Frasier returned to the room. The two rather large guards at the door had allowed her to enter my cell.

"I'm sorry we had to put you in here. We converted these rooms to isolation units..."

"Do not worry Doctor. I understand."

"Hey Doc, what can you tell us. Is this Marty or not?"

The doctor looked at O'Neill leaning on a wall near the door. "Colonel, all our tests say that this is Martouf, the same Martouf that left this facility dead after Major Carter zatted him twice. I still have a few more tests I'd like to run but I don't think the results will differ from what I've already found."

O'Neill looked disappointed. "Well then. Care to tell me what brought you here, alive, looking for Major Carter?"

Janet Frasier continued to watch the Colonel. I do not know why she stayed but I felt better that she was here with us.

"I came to see Samantha."

"You already said that and I told you that she was unavailable."

As I was about to say something the door opened. General Hammond and Samantha entered. The General spoke first. "Colonel, what can you tell us?"

"Look like he's for real. He won't tell me anything, just that he has to talk to Carter, sir."

I saw the look in Samantha's eyes when she realized that I was alive and here. She wanted to say or do something but she could not. I remembered the look in her eyes as I died in her arms. Never do I wish to cause anyone that much pain again.

Samantha moved forward, closer to me. O'Neill started to stop her but was stopped by General Hammond. She was in front of me, starring into my eyes. "Martouf? Is this really you?" Her voice was soft and warm as I remembered it. She touched my hand with hers.

I nodded and smiled at her. I let down some of my barriers so that she could see that it was I. A memory or two floated between us. She lowered her head as they washed over her. When it was over she stood and turned to face her superior officers.

"General, Colonel. I believe that this is Martouf. I don't know how, but it is him."

"I knew that you would be able to tell Samantha. That is why I came here. There is a problem."

"When isn't there with the Tok'ra?" Jack O’Neill said. General Hammond glared at O'Neill silencing him with a look.

"I understand your sarcasm and bitterness Colonel. I have been made aware of your encounter with Kanin."

"Well, isn't that peachy. I must be the talk of the Tok'ra."

"No. Kanin is. He violated many of our beliefs in his blending with you."

General Hammond intervened.

"Son, tell us how you are with us."

I nod. "Anise/Freya took my body with her back to her research lab. I woke up a few hours later to find myself in a sarcophagus."

I could hear O'Neill mumbling something about snakeheads and caskets.

Samantha sat next to me, at some point taking my hand back in hers. It made telling the story easier.

"I then found myself being removed from the sarcophagus and placed on the Zartac detecting machine. She tried many times and many different ways to rid me of the programming. After a while she had Lantesh extracted. The programming was in me...not Lantesh. After many attempted escapes and attempted cures she found a setting on one of her machines to set me free from the programming. Some times during the early attempts I would die. Some times I would attempt escape and would be killed. I spent many times in the sarcophagus until Anise/Freya found a way to deprogram me."

I could see the empathy and pain in Samantha's eyes. I heard it in her voice. "Martouf. It must have been horrible for you."

"It was not pleasant. I felt violated. Not only had I been programmed to harm friends and allies, but now I had been placed in a sarcophagus against the beliefs of the Tok'ra, my beliefs"

She held my hand. I saw the Colonel watch her - watch me. She looked into my eyes. "There is more, isn't there?"

I lowered my head and nodded.

"Tell us."

I raised my head. "A rift has taken place in the Tok'ra. Many follow the old ways as I do, as Selmak does. However, there are younger, more impatient ones that follow the Queen and Malik."

At the mention of a Tok'ra Queen, Jack's eyes fixed themselves on Martouf. "But the Queen is dead."

"She was. However, Malik and his followers brought her back through the gate to where I was being deprogrammed. It is the only sarcophagus known to be in the hands of the Tok'ra."

"They brought her back to life." Sam's voice was almost a whisper.

"Yes, Samantha. Against everything she taught she was restored to life. By the time Malik was through telling her of our fight, our allies and our impeding doom, she relented."

Hammond and O'Neill listened. This was not good news. A rift in the Tok'ra movement could only further worsen the situation.

O'Neill moved forward, standing near to where Carter sat. "And why are you telling us this?"

I smiled. "I know what you think of us, Colonel. However, I do appreciate what the Tau’ri and especially Samantha's father have done for us, what you have done for us. I believe that if we follow Malik we will become no better than the Goa'uld."

O'Neill continued to wait for me to continue.

"I want the Tau'ri, the SGC, all of you to help us fight the new Tok'ra movement before it destroys all the good the Queen once did when she broke with the Goa'uld."

I saw a look pass over the General's face. Whatever the word was it evoked a strong emotion. I believe that he was reliving a point in his life that would color his decision to help us.

As the CMO for the SGC I see a lot of strange things. If someone had told me when I was in medical school that I would be fighting alien viruses, treating injuries by using alien technologies or even that I would be meeting an alien, I would have laughed in their face. Any one that had told me that I would be treating people on other planets would have found their selves committed.

I had double-checked my findings. Everything pointed to this being the same Martouf that Major Carter had killed several years ago. I wasn’t sure how that could be true. Then I remembered that Sam, Major Carter that is, had said that Lantesh had been found alive.

If Lantesh was alive and had been dead when he left the SGC still in Martouf’s body, I knew that this could be the Martouf we knew. And once Anise/Freya was brought into the equation, I had even less hesitation about this being Martouf. Then you add into the mix the way he acted around Major Carter, and the reaction he created in Colonel O’Neill…it was just like it always went.

Oh yes, this could be the Martouf we knew. Too bad there was no way to be absolutely sure.

Some days I can’t wait for the day to begin. Then there are days like today where I can’t wait for them to be over. The Stargate looks deceptively benign as I look at it from the Briefing Room. Like all tools, it is capable of bring us marvelous things and horrible nightmares. 

Most days I don't regret not having retired yet.

Martouf has risen from the dead. It shouldn’t have surprised me. We’d seen Cronos raise Apophis from the dead so we knew it could be done. I knew there was a possibility when Major Carter told me of finding the symbiote, Lantesh alive on one of their missions. That he subsequently died saving SG-1, Jacob and the mission they were on was a loss to our cause. That we lost one of our brightest rising stars in Lt. Elliott was one of the harder losses for me.

Losing seasoned officers is always hard. Many times they are men and women that you have served with and even knew their families. For me though, it’s losing the young ones that always keeps me awake at night. We, the old soldiers, know the risks and can accept them. I often wonder if the young ones have a clue what they are getting into.

Elliott had the potential and the "right stuff" to go far. It took a lot to get and keep Colonel O’Neill’s attention. Elliott had done that, showed O’Neill a reflection of himself when he’d risked radiation exposure to save the base and to save his teammate.

However, tonight I would be wrestling with another nightmare.

All I could think of when Martouf mentioned a rift in the Tok’ra movement was Vietnam. I’d been there. I knew what it was like to never know if the face in front of you was friend or foe. I know that we never really don’t know if a blended individual is friend or foe even now. That has been bad enough. A three-front war would be a disaster. A three-front war was only better if you were facing a four-front war. Right now we are holding our own out there. We win some and lose some. That’s the way an on-going war usually goes.

The only thing worse than a split in the Tok’ra would be if the same thing happened with the Jaffa rebellion. The thought had crossed my mind. Bra’tac and Teal’c no longer carried symbiotes. They relied on medication from the Tok’ra. It would not surprise me for some Jaffa to have problems with that. It was only Bra’tac’s and Teal’c’s understanding of the reasons I did what I did and their desire to be of service in freeing their people that has allowed me to put that thought aside. A four-front war…part Jaffa, part Tok’ra, Anubis and the rest of the system lords….

I walked back into my office and closed the door. Sitting at my desk I picked up the red phone. "This is General Hammond. I need to speak to the President."

God, help us. If this was heading where I thought it was heading it might just take God to get us through it.

I watched Carter tense when he came through the horizon. Yes…I know…I usually say "the gate." Remember. I only play dumb…it’s a tactical thing. Always keep them guessing about what you know.

OK, back to Carter. I watched her, instinctively moving closer. Not too close though. Then I saw her not reacting to her name. I reached out and touched her shoulder. She had been so far away. I watched her return to here, now, me. Her eyes, always the most expressive of her features, showed where she’d been. She’d been trying to find a way for this Martouf to be him.

Him. Why was he here? What did we have that he wanted? I could only hope that this was not him. In my report, (yes I do actually finish them) I did mention the possibility after we found Lantesh.

Damn, the Tok’ra with a sarcophagus. Should have seen it coming. Should have known something was amiss when Malik and his bunch took the Queen through the gate. Something should have clicked. Damn. Maybe I am getting too old for this.

I want to know what he knows. I want to know what he thinks we can do about it. I know damn well that this isn’t a good thing. Trouble enough getting one group of Tok’ra to work with us. Two of them…not something I want to deal with at the moment.

Carter. She was still just sitting there. Maybe I should get her out of here. If anyone can tell us if this is Martouf it’s the Doc and Carter.

"Permission to go to the Infirmary and interrogate our guest, sir."

The General granted permission and Carter, Teal’c and Jonas started to follow me. Then the General kept Carter there. Her eyes and mine met. She knew I had to go and she had to stay. Nothing new. She knew I’d keep her informed.

Then we were all there in one of the isolation rooms off from the Infirmary. Damn. It was Marty. Him and Carter. There was a way about how they interacted. It was like she was different somehow when she was around him. Gentler, softer…more woman than ever. Maybe that was why I didn’t like Marty. Nothing to do with a snake in his head…a snake that was no longer there. It was another thing that I had to consider. I wonder if he realized that he was no longer Tok’ra, least not by their standards.

Maybe I didn’t like him because he was free to act on his feelings. Maybe I didn’t like him because he was Tok’ra and I knew what Jolinar had done in taking Carter.

Yes, I know…she gave up her life for Carter’s but I have a theory on that one, too. And it isn’t as altruistic as it might appear. Maybe I am just j…

"Colonel?"

The voice that can reach me no matter where I am spoke.

"Yes. What is it Major?"

Eyes met. She knew I was off somewhere doing my job…well, sort of. She grinned. God, she could read me like no other person in the universe.

She pulled her grin back a bit. I saw that she had extricated her hands from Martouf’s hands and moved to my side.

"What do we do now, sir?"

I looked at her. Sometimes the faith she had in me scares me. It also challenges me. That faith has made me a better man than I thought I could be. Like Daniel, she had given me back a part of my life I had thought I had lost. She asks nothing more of me than for me to be who I am, to do my best and to listen. Yep, scary.

"Not sure Carter. Right now it’s up to the General and the President. I do know that it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better."

She looked back at Doc doing a few more tests on Martouf. "I was afraid you were going to say that, sir."

Her reply told me she’d been thinking some pretty scary thoughts herself. The extra "sir" told me that she was fighting to sort out Jolinar’s feelings, her feelings and her duty.

Most times I stand and observe. It was how I survived my time in service to Apophis. Here, now, I do it to learn. Much can be learned by listening and watching. When I was first on this planet I asked Daniel Jackson how I could learn more. He gave me books to read and then he told me to listen to those around me and watch how they stood, their body language he called it. I have been able to learn much from these observations.

Major Carter is both happy and worried since Martouf has arrived through the Gate. He has once again aroused the memories of Jolinar within her. It complicates an already complicated relationship she has with Colonel O’Neill.

Colonel O’Neill is not happy that Martouf had returned. I believe that this is rooted in both professional and personal areas. His concern for Major Carter was evident in the Control Room to those that took the time to notice. His dislike for Martouf evident when he questioned him needed no close observation.

I worry that Martouf’s revelations will set back our cause rather than advance it. Already there have been rumblings in the Jaffa rebellion. This can not be a good thing, this possible split in the Tok’ra movement.

I can only hope that we can contact Jacob Carter about Martouf’s information.

Everyone has gone his or her separate ways now. O’Neill is in his office, as is the General. Major Carter decided to take a walk outside Cheyenne Mountain. Martouf is resting in the Isolations Unit with two guards on his door until we can get some confirmation of either his information or his escape from Anise.

Jonas Quinn has decided to reread some of the old mission reports involving the Tok’ra. Doctor Frasier is running more tests. She is concerned about Martouf’s extended time in the sarcophagus. However, there is little documented information on the effects on a blended personality.

I am in my quarters about to perform my meditations. I know that it is no longer required of me to sustain myself. In a sense it still provides a benefit. It allows me time to think and to contemplate that which I have heard and seen.

I will remain here until I am summoned.

I am still in the Isolation Unit. Samantha has requested that I be released in her custody. I must admit that I am pleased with that possibility.

Soon there will be no time for such pleasant thoughts. Soon I will have to return to the Tok’ra.

Perhaps they can find me another symbiote. Perhaps I will fight as the Tau’ri fight, with the knowledge that death is a constant companion. With out Lantesh I have an empty spot in my head and my heart but not my soul. I knew when I first took on a symbiote that I believed as the Tok’ra did. I believed then as I do now that those that are not loyal to what we believe are the enemies.

So be it then. Those that cross the line and believe as Malik and others believe; that expediency and any measure against the Goa’uld is a good thing, are my enemies. Those that believe that we should abandon our beliefs of millennia to achieve a victory are more dangerous than the Goa’uld.